Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Seeds of Change

I spent the weekend shopping for a new generator and looking for pussywillows by the side of the road-so many of them were already covered with pollen! This unseasonably warm weather is crazy!

The last couple days have been filled with work and chores, and starting seeds on the windowsills. I spent the whole weekend thinking about how big my garden would be and how I could get more chickens, and maybe two pigs and a cow for meat this year, since this is likely to be my last summer that I'm not on call the entire time.

Then I got a call from school...they want me to go to Florida for the summer. Why couldn't I have gotten that call on January 30th? Can someone tell me that?

I know if I go to Florida, everything changes. I know that what is here at home will be other than how I left it. I feel like this is asking too much of me.

My mom always told me I was too rigid, "The only thing you can count on in life, Nikki, is change, so you've got to get more comfortable with it." Well I've had enough, I want some down time and some predictability. Security is probably a myth, but a fairytale doesn't seem so bad right now.

I wish I could be like the seeds. I love them, because they are 100% potential. Within those tomato seeds are fresh salads, tasty sauces, and all the smells of summer. Right now with these seeds, my garden and my life are perfect. Nothing has been ruined by storms, pests, or neglect.

In my head, all of my plans turn out perfectly and nothing is wasted. If only life were that way.

Voluptuous update: I have been making fresh bread everyday and it is amazing.

Simplicity update: The joy of clean hair cannot be underestimated.